New (For Me) Things I’m Trying for Anxiety

In my journey with crippling anxiety, I feel like I’ve seen it all; every tip, every trick. I refuse to mislead my readers by saying these are “new” techniques, but they are things that I haven’t taken seriously enough.

As cliche as it is, it’s 2020 and I’m sick of having this dark cloud and fear attached to me even when I’m supposed to be happy. These will hopefully become habitual for me.

Continue reading “New (For Me) Things I’m Trying for Anxiety”

8 Lessons I Learned About Drama in College

This is a repost of my Odyssey article, which you can see here! (Please look because I get paid based on views, lol)

Something I learned: People are not who they seem to be- especially when you are a scared, little freshman.


This year I got pushed around and trampled all over by people who I thought were my friends. My biggest mistake was trusting people who I barely knew just because I was in a new environment and wanted to fit in.

At the beginning of the year the girls on my floor hosted “girls’ nights” and we all gathered around and did what girls do best- gossiped. We all gossiped about ourselves, because we had nothing to say about the people we didn’t know yet. Gossiping about yourself is so much worse than gossiping about other people. Girls Night turned into “never have I ever” and “tell me your life story”. The next day it was, “She’s a slut,” and, “Wow, I hate her,” and the cliques were formed; all because of things that we confessed to people whojust wanted gossip.

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I got caught up in fake, dramatic people’s trouble all year and let it run my life instead of focusing on what I was really in college for- academics.


Something I learned: You do not have to settle for people you don’t want to be friends with just to have someone to hang out with.


How to Spot These People in Conversations (and what to say back)

1. They straight off the bat ask your opinion about people.

You know- “Heyyyy… So what do you think about Shelia? She’s kind of mean, huh?”

Say, “I don’t know her that well, so I don’t have an opinion on her.” If you say anything even remotelynegative, they will tell people.

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2. They talk about people who you thought were their friends.

“You will not believe what -enter “best friend”‘s name- did last night.”

Most likely that best friend didn’t want anybody to know. So, what you say is, “I don’t think that is any of my business, and ‘m sure she wouldn’t want other people to know either.”

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3. They’re always “here for you”- but only when you’re upset.

*Pats your back* “Oh, honey, it’s okay, I’m here for you.” *Posts dirt on Twitter to start more drama*.

Do not give them the details, and kindly tell them that you will be okay and just need some alone time.

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4. They randomly get mad at you and make a big deal out of it.

For example, you think everything is fine and dandy until they randomly block you on everything and say passive aggressive things about you. This one happened to me a lot this year.

With this one you have options based on what you seem fit. What I usually do is talk to them directly about it so there is no telephone game style confusion. Plus, by asking other people what her problem is, drama spreads more.Source: Giphy.com

5. Also, I have noticed that these types of people in college do not really care about academics, and are more focused on their friend group.

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How to Protect Yourself in These Situations:

1. Do not talk about your personal life to people who are really still strangers (less than 3-4 months of friendship)

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2. Make it seem like you’re always doing fine; don’t talk about the problems you’re having.

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3. Try to distance yourself socially and mentally from people you do not know or like (Side note: by all means, be social, but not with people who display the character traits listed above)

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4. Do not feed into drama. This means: don’t respond to salty Twitter posts, turn the other cheek, don’t talk about anyone in any way, and focus on yourself.

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My boyfriend says something sad (but true) about me and the people I befriend; I have a “2 month rule”. After 2 months I get rid of my new friends or we have a big fight and end up hating each other. Honestly, it’s true. My problem is that I trust these random people and hope that their heart is as good as mine- which rarely happens. In the rare circumstance that I find one of these people, we are friends for longer than 2 months. My best friends and I have been friends all freshman year, because we did not immediately trust one another and talk about each other behind our backs. Find people that you truly get along with and like, and make them your friends. I wish I had been friendless for a few months rather than having 8 different close friends in a few months.

Take home message: Do not divulge your personal life into people you just met. Wait until you have been friends with them at least for more than two months. You don’t need to make your life harder with unnecessary drama.

Ways I Keep Myself From Breaking Down (Even in the Worst Situations)

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First off , I’m not going to go on some monotonous rant about positivity that you’ve read/heard 8,000,000 times. I know how difficult it is to stay positive when you feel completely, utterly, indescribably horrible. I personally struggle with depression and a roller-coaster of a life so trust me- I understand, and these are some things I do to keep myself semi-sane.

  1. I’m the kind of person that needs support. It doesn’t matter if it’s from one person or 80- I need somebody that I feel like I can talk to about whatever is going on. I usually lean on my super awesome and very supportive boyfriend of 3 years. He listens to me and will offer advice if I ask for it. If you are looking for somebody to talk to; parents, siblings, grandparents, significant other, teacher, adviser, friend… Anyone you deem worthy. I just suggest not keeping everything bottled up and then exploding.
  2. I pour myself into my work. Whether it be homework, blogging, planning my day, cooking, running errands- whatever. I pour my mind and body into what I’m doing. It helps me stay distracted while providing me with my need to feel productive. 
  3. Depending on how bad I feel, sometimes I need to do something completely unproductive to clear my mind. Today for instance, I received very bad news. So, I played the heck out of Star Wars Battlefront and watched a ton of 90210 episodes. I focused on Naomi’s event planning and blowing up imperials with homing missiles instead of the news I received.
  4. I actually acknowledge my feelings. It’s okay to cry, and if that’s how you express your sadness- cry. Know that you’re sad and why and just accept that you’re a human being that has emotions.
  5. I try to maintain my yoga/fitness schedule. When you’re stressed out and sad is when you need it the most. Focus on your breathing instead of your problems, and don’t let your body go to $#!& because you’re sad. 
  6. I take time away from everybody else. It’s hard for me to be around people when I’m hurting, so I stay away. I’ll go play a game or write; that’s what I’m doing right now. If you can stand it, take one of those pamper yourself baths. (With Jaedyn’s Natural Cosmetics- as soon as it launches!) 
  7. I try to find someone that is going through the same thing, or better yet, someone who did and got through it. I’ve been wanting to talk to these two guys I know that are going/went through some of what I’m going through now. I feel like they can offer advice that will help me to stop free falling with my emotions.
  8. I avoid things that will trigger negative emotions. I try to steer clear of anything that will make me feel worse.
  9. I maintain my healthy diet because it sucks to feel mentally ran over and physically ran over.
  10. I do things that I know will make me happy. I’ll buy myself something small, or go eat some ice-cream loaded with hot fudge.

What do you do when times are tough?